My life changed dramatically and forever when I lost TJ.

I welcome you to follow along as I adjust to my "new normal".

It is not all puppies and ice cream but it is my life....real and honest.


Tuesday, October 16, 2012

I Have Been MIA

Yes, I have been MIA. No blog reading, no blog writing. Nada...nothing. If you have been a reader of mine for a while you know I do this periodically. Life just gets in the way. Things finally picked up at work and that left me less time for reading and writing. When things were slow I got in the habit of doing those things while at work.

October is also a rough month for me. It was on this day 3 years ago that Dr. N told TJ there was nothing else he could do for him. He suggested we call in Hospice to control his pain for the time he had left. I was crushed and scared. I will never forget the look in TJ's eyes as he looked over at me and asked me if I was going to be OK. I, of course, told him I would be fine. But the reality of it was that what little bit of me that hadn't already died was preparing to die right alongside of him. I just wasn't prepared for how much of myself I was going to lose. I had no idea that my spirit and zest for life would be gone when he was.

On a brighter note. My boss suggested to me that I work at home 1 or 2 days a week. I worked at home for 11 years while TJ & I ran a business. While it was good to "go" back to work in 2008 I am looking forward to working at home part time again. I will be starting off working at home just one day a week and providing it all goes well, and I assure you it will, I will increase that to 2 days a week. I could not be happier about this. But more importantly, Tater Tot is absolutely thrilled. Today was my first day working at home again and when he realized I wasn't leaving he grabbed a toy and ran laps through the house. Seeing his joy was priceless.


I was actually fairly busy today, but being able to turn my head and see him happily chewing on his bone made my day. He stayed on the bench by my desk all day long.

7 comments:

  1. Oh I am so happy you are working at home. You are in good company.
    October is a hard month for me also. Take care and lots of HUGS. B

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  2. i had been thinking of you as i missed your sweet visits. :)

    the working from home bit sounds awesome! i was able to work from home for my previous employer for about 4 mos (until they announced they were selling off to a competitor - then i returned to the corp. office until the end). it is a sweet gig for those that can get it. :)

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  3. lucky girl. so glad you'll be home with your furry buddy and i know the Tot is thrilled. maybe it will become only leaving home for 1 or 2 days of work. wishing you peace.

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  4. How awesome that you are working from home some! Tater Tot will sure appreciate it :-)

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  5. Oooo, so happy you can work at home :))

    do you need a secretary? XXxx

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  6. That is awesome about Tater and the home office days!!!! Eric recently started working PT at home too and Petey is like "mom who" and OVER-THE-MOON!

    Well, I miss you whe you disappear :)

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  7. I'm so happy that you and Tater Tot found each other. It's clear you will help each other through this thing called life.

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