My life changed dramatically and forever when I lost TJ.

I welcome you to follow along as I adjust to my "new normal".

It is not all puppies and ice cream but it is my life....real and honest.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

My 2nd Thanksgiving Without TJ

I can't hardly believe that TJ has been gone long enough for me to have 2 Thanksgivings without him. This time last year I was being told..."it will get easier with time" and "time heals". Well, at that point I thought they were all nuts!!! But it turns out they were right.

I really wanted to host Thanksgiving in my new house and since my sister already had plans I invited friends. I kept it small and had everyone bring a dish so as to not make it too stressful for me. It was wonderful and really made me once again realize how lucky I am to have such wonderful friends in my life.

I took all of Thanksgiving week off of work so I had 9 days off and boy was that nice. First time in over 1 1/2 years that I have taken time off work for me and was not sitting at someone's bedside. I didn't do anything special but got lots of little things done around the house and got to spend some time with friends.

I was busy enjoying myself on Thanksgiving and didn't take many pictures but posted a few here. Note that it was the women who carved the turkey....the men were busy watching football and we just let them be.

I hope you all (my American readers) had as wonderful Thanksgiving as I did.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Living in a Positive Manner

I know I have said this before but I absolutely have no tolerance for people complaining.

  • Someone complained to me the other day that they only got 6 hours of sleep the night before....when TJ was at his worst I often went to work with 1 hour or less of sleep.

  • When I hear someone say that their "Significant Other" does not call them as often as they used to....I think TJ will never call me again.

  • When I hear someone complain that their "Significan Other" does not do enough to help them around the house.....I literally do it all by myself every single day.

  • When I hear someone complain about their job....I remember the sorrow, deep pain and tears in TJ's eyes when he learned he would never work again.

It is all about perspective, we need to see and appreciate what we have.

Life can be beautiful! It is true that those who have had a life altering experience become more accepting and peaceful but anyone can start now to see the beauty in life.

It is utterly useless to complain about things. Negative people bring themselves down as well as those around them. Instead of complaining focus your energy on what you can do to solve the problem, this is much more productive.

Learn to let go. This is the most empowering thing you can do for yourself. You can either hold on to the way things were or you can bite the bullet and accept the way your life is now. By learning to let go of even the smallest of things that happen in everyday life you will find you are living with much more happiness and ease.

Over the past year I have searched for ways to start my day in a positive manner. While these are some of the things that work for me I encourage you to find your own things that will make you start your day with positive thoughts.

  • I start every day with this song click here (find your own song that starts your day with a smile).

  • I think of 1 thing that I am grateful for...big or small it does not matter just one thing and on really good days I have a whole list of things.

  • I no longer turn on the news first thing. We all know how depressing and negative the news is so it can't be a positive start to your day.

  • I spend about 15 minutes enjoying the company of my dogs. My animals bring me immense joy and this is my form of meditation.

You may be thinking that you don't have the time for this in the morning, but if waking up 20 minutes earlier gives you a more positive outlook on life and a better day and better you isn't it worth it?

"It is only possible to live happily-ever-after on a day-to-day basis" ---Margaret Bonnano