My life changed dramatically and forever when I lost TJ.

I welcome you to follow along as I adjust to my "new normal".

It is not all puppies and ice cream but it is my life....real and honest.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


I think I have turned a corner in adjusting to my "new normal". This might have happened in part due to the fact that I am finally feeling significantly less pain from my accident.  I also think time has a lot to do with it. Frankly, I am not sure exactly what the trigger was and at this point I don't care. What I do know is that I am happy and for now that is all that matters.

In the beginning, I felt powerless to let go of the the life TJ and I shared. I felt as though I needed to carry it with me forever. I let it dictate my daily life, at least on some level. By doing this I was stuck and as I have said before, I am tired of being stuck and it is time for me to let go and be free again. I know this isn't as easy as it sounds but it is a choice I have to make for myself.

I was overwhelmed with options for my future and I have weeded many of them out. I found I was reading too much into the future, yet still dwelling on the past. I will never have what I had with TJ; the good and the bad. I am capable though, of having a beautiful day today and a beautiful tomorrow. To me, this means letting go of who I have been and do something differently.

There is no such thing as "normal" and there is not a specific way I "should" be or anything I am "supposed" to do.  It is up to me to determine what will make my life meaningful and joyful.  I have to walk the path that is right for me.  Most importantly I believe I have discovered that path. At this point it is more like an unmaintained trail but I know it will lead me to something great and wonderful.

"No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again." ~ Buddha


  1. that's wonderful. And I am so glad to hear the pain is more manageable!

  2. I had to tell myself this morning that there are no supposeds as well. Sometimes I feel the need to TELL people things rather than just share what I've been through and what worked for me. Thanks :)

  3. I knew something was changing after I read your Stop and Smell the Roses post. I think I saw the word SMILE in there. Walk down that path, one step at a time, one day at a time and the smiles will continue to come. Sending love, Inger


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