My life changed dramatically and forever when I lost TJ.

I welcome you to follow along as I adjust to my "new normal".

It is not all puppies and ice cream but it is my life....real and honest.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Weird Week

Just like last time, TJ felt pretty good this week with the exception of his back. I don't know why but the week before his next chemo he gets severe back pain. It just doesn't make sense to me, but hey, neither does this whole cancer thing. They just don't warn you of all the side effects of chemo, all the mental ups and downs, basically you know nothing about this journey until suddenly you are tossed into it head first. When I say head first I mean that literally, you feel like someone has dropped you on your head and left you there all alone to struggle with the pains and the not knowing if you are OK or not. Basically, it sucks, but thank goodness for the great sources of information such as Twitter, Blogs and friends that have "been there, done that".
Now, for the weird part of the week. This morning when I left for work at 6:20 am TJ was absolutely miserable with back pain. I expected him to be down most if not all of the day. He took a Hydrocodone as I was leaving and I also put some of the lotion on his back.
I was at work trying to concentrate but worrying about how TJ was feeling as I had not received a text from him since about 8:30. Well, lo and behold who walks through my office door at 11:30? TJ, declaring that he is hungry and wants to order some lunch!! Once again I ask you - WHO FLIPPED THE SWITCH??!! Crazy cancer chemo stuff! So, we ordered some lunch, he went and picked it up and we ate together at my desk, it was nice. I am so grateful to work for a great guy that allows this without question even though I work straight 8's. I love my hours, 7 to 3, and am lucky to have some freedom to do things like that today. When I got home TJ and I actually had a beer together and "HE" cooked dinner and even cleaned up. Makes me dread chemo week next week when all this will go away. Oh well, just gotta enjoy the good times while we have them.
Battle On TJ, Battle On

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